Problems vs. Circumstances

The other day, I went to the Apple store because something was wrong with my phone (or so I thought). When my name was called, one of the employees (I think they're called Geniuses?) informed me that a guy named Shane would be assisting me today. Ok, great. I thought to myself. Let's get this show on the road. For some reason, going to the Apple store always stresses me out. Maybe it's because there are always so many people there, or maybe it's because whenever I ask for help I am reminded of how little I know about technology. The point is: if I had to list my favorite stores, the Apple store wouldn't make the cut.

But this time was unlike any other experience I'd had at the Apple store. As the first guy I met introduced me to Shane, the guy who would hopefully fix my problem, I realized that something was different about Shane. His eyes were almost completely closed, and he had a small keypad-type thing across which his fingers were rapidly moving. It didn't take me long to figure it out: Shane was blind. 

For a split second I thought, How can he help me? He can't even see my phone. However, something told me to just go with it. Shane and I made small talk for a bit before he got down to business. When I introduced myself, he asked if I spelled my name with an "h." I told him that I did, and he replied, "Good. That's the right way to spell Sarah." I immediately liked him. (But I couldn't help but wonder what he would have said if I had told him that I didn't spell my name with an "h.") 

When I explained my problem to Shane, he patiently listened, all the while running his fingers across his keypad. After I finished, he said, "What you have here isn't a problem." It isn't? I thought, slightly confused. He continued, "It's a circumstance. Problems have a solution. Circumstances mean you just have to adapt." He explained that what I had believed to be a problem with my phone was actually just something that I didn't understand (of course, he said it in a much nicer way). Now, the moral of this story isn't that it's possible to be able to work in the Apple store, even without the ability to see (even though that's pretty cool in and of itself). What I love about my interaction with Shane is how he showed me that so often the things I consider problems that require solutions are merely circumstances that require my willingness to adapt.

During those few minutes I spent with Shane, I realized that he doesn't view life as a series of problems and solutions, but rather as a journey of circumstances and adaptations. I mean, think about it: as a blind man, he could be sitting around feeling sorry for himself and wishing that he could see, and I certainly wouldn't blame him. But instead, he chooses to live his life as a glass-half-full type of guy. Shane shared with me that in addition to having worked at the Apple store for 4 years, he was about to finish his first year of law school. Talk about an inspiration. 

When I walked into the Apple store the other day, I certainly didn't expect to walk out with a new perspective on life. But that's exactly how God works, isn't it? I know how the cliché saying goes: "Everything happens for a reason." But it's so true. God strategically places people (and circumstances) in our lives for a specific purpose. I'm so grateful that He allowed me to cross paths with Shane, even if it was for a brief moment, to show me that life is full of circumstances, and what's important is how we choose to react to them. And on top of that, I'm not afraid of the Apple store anymore. 

Actually

I would like to share one of my favorite quotes in the entire world. The first time I heard it was when I watched the movie Akeelah and the Bee, a film that I would highly recommend:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?" Actually, who are you not to be?

Here is the part of the movie with the quote.

I love the part when Laurence Fishburne asks, "Afraid of what?" and Akeelah responds, "Me." I love this part of the movie because I find it so relatable. So often I find that it's really easy to put myself down, to point out my flaws to myself (sometimes I even find ways to create "flaws" that never bothered me before), to ask myself, "Who would want to be friends with me?" During my freshman year at Wake Forest, I learned a lot about myself. Something particularly difficult for me to learn--it still is--was the knowledge that nothing truly good or fruitful comes from constantly comparing oneself to others. Teddy Roosevelt really hit the nail on the head when he said,

In my experience, it truly is. I have found that I can be truly happy only when I have accepted that I have certain gifts and other people have certain gifts--we're all different (I know, I know, this is really groundbreaking stuff that no one has ever heard before--sometimes i just gotta bring it back to the basics). But what I'm trying to say is that I truly believe that the world would be a better place if, instead of always trying to "put aside our differences," we try putting our differences together by embracing our unique gifts. 

That was definitely an unintentional tangent. Focus, Sarah. You were talking about some quote from Akeelah and the Bee, remember? (Sometimes I have to talk to myself to get back on track). 

Ok, back to the original focus of this post: my favorite quote. There are just so many things I love about this quote; therefore, I'm going to break it up into sections (bear with me--I'm unleashing my inner English nerd here).

"It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us."

As I reread this part of the quote, I realize how true it is for me. I feel like sometimes we are so quick to admit our flaws and our faults, yet we tend to neglect the things we like about ourselves. This past spring break, I went home with a friend from Wake along with another friend, and one night we were just sitting around talking, asking each other random questions (some silly, some deep). Eventually someone said, "Name a physical trait and a personality characteristic that you like about yourself." It took each of us a little longer to answer this one than it did some of the earlier questions (partially because I think we didn't want to appear to be bragging about ourselves, but also because rarely do we examine our own traits--both physical and personality--in a positive light). As we shared with each other, I could feel our friendship becoming stronger. It was so neat for me to see two of my best friends acknowledge some of the traits that I see in them every day, and it was empowering for me to be able to vocalize some things about myself that I actually like. I know that was kind of a cheesy story, but I really do believe that by simply expressing two things we liked about ourselves, each of us gained something valuable. All that to say, it really is important to be able to view ourselves in a positive light. Because let's be honest, the world could use a little less negativity.

"Brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous" 

I can't exactly put my finger on what it is, but there is something about this string of words that I just love. I think maybe it's because they're just such positive words. I mean, who wouldn't want to be described as any of these things? I also love how there's no "and" or "or" between "talented" and "fabulous"--each of these adjectives are just strung together, like beads on a necklace. The way I understand this quote, it's like the speaker is saying that it is possible to be all four of these things--there are no limits or restrictions. I realize that I may be a little overly optimistic here, but I'd much rather look on the bright side. 

"Actually"

Ok, I do realize that this might be a little bit of a stretch for those of you who don't love English as much as I do, but bear with me. (Or not--if you've made it this far in the post then kudos to you! You should celebrate with a well-deserved nap.) What I love about the use of the word "actually" here is that it quickly shifts the tone of the quote. The question asked immediately before Actually ('Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?') is so pessimistic, reflecting self doubt and a sense of hopelessness. But here comes Actually to save the day, shining its light, casting out all self consciousness and replacing it with self confidence.

Sometimes, it can be hard for us to hear the "actually." Sometimes, we get so bogged down by the struggles of life that we fail to seek its many joys. Sometimes, it might take slowing down a little bit to find our "actually," to attain that sense of empowerment, that feeling of confidence, that rush of passion for life. But when we do find it, it's so worth it. 

Lessons Learned

I can't believe that freshman year is almost over. Time is a funny thing...high school seems like so long ago, but at the same time I feel like the past 8 months have flown by. I can't (and don't want to) imagine not being at Wake Forest. I can't even begin to imagine how different my life would have been if I had chosen a different path, if I hadn't met the friends I've made here...which brings me to my point: During my brief time here at Wake, I have learned that God puts us exactly where we are supposed to be at exactly the right time. So often we are unaware of this, or we try to tell God that He made a mistake (I frequently find myself asking, "Why do You have me here, God? What am I doing with my life? What is my purpose?") And God, being the loving Father that He is, patiently reminds me, My child, you are here for a specific purpose. Even if you can't see what that purpose is at this moment in time, trust in Me. Take comfort in the knowledge that you are Mine, and you are loved. 

So many times over the course of these past 8 months, I have questioned, doubted, and feared. And every time, I have been reminded of God's Love, Patience, and Goodness. In everything, He is sovereign. I am reminded of Isaiah 55:8, when God says, For My Thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My Ways. When I read this verse, I rejoice because I realize that if God had the same thoughts and plans that I do, I would be in serious trouble. I find peace in knowing that God is in control. He knows exactly what my future holds--more importantly, He holds my future in His Hands. 

Although I still don't know what I want to major in or what exactly I want to do for a living, I have learned that it doesn't matter. And when I say "it doesn't matter," I am not at all saying that the choices I make don't have a purpose. What I am saying is that in the grand scheme of things, my major and career are insignificant--what gives them importance is how I use them (actually, how I am used to glorify God). Whenever I stress out about my uncertain future, it helps to put things into perspective: 

1. I am here now. And wherever here is, I need to accept it, embrace it, and just be. (Easier said than done, but so worth it). 

2. My true purpose in life is to glorify God. Regardless of my circumstances, major, or career, I was made to love and serve Him.

3. God is in control. One of my favorite chapters of the Bible is Psalm 139, which serves as such an important reminder: 

You have searched me, O Lord, and You know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; You perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; You are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, O Lord, You know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, You have laid your hand upon me.

When I look back over my freshman year, I can clearly see how God has been with me every step of the way, through the good as well as the bad. The other day, I was going for a run/walk...a wun or a ralk, if you will. It's become one of my hobbies. Sure, running is better cardio, but walking allows me to actually enjoy my surroundings without struggling to breathe. Therefore, I wun. Or ralk. It's the best of both worlds, really (queue Hannah Montana theme song). Anyhow, I was just spending some quality me time in nature, and I was suddenly, overwhelmingly overcome with peace. In that instant, I knew that I was meant to be at Wake. Furthermore, I was meant to be outside, walk/running through Reynolda Village at that given moment in time. I don't know if I have ever felt more sure that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. And it was at that point that I wondered to myself: Is this what it's like to feel completely in sync with God? To feel at peace for some unexplainable yet abundantly clear reason? To feel both confident and uncertain at the same time, yet completely okay with it? 

I know, it doesn't seem to make much sense, but that's just how God is. He works in ways that we don't always understand, but we must find peace in the realization that He is ultimately in control, and everything will ultimately work together for good.

Spring, O How I Love Thee!

“When spring came, even the false spring, there were no problems except where to be happiest. The only thing that could spoil a day was people and if you could keep from making engagements, each day had no limits. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself.” 

-Ernest Hemingway

Spring is here. FINALLY. (My man Ernest is pretty psyched too.) I can't even tell you how long I have been waiting for this. Actually I can--ever since the beginning of winter, which I feel like has lasted an eternity...what is this, Narnia? Springtime is one of my favorite things. It truly is a magical time of year. Everything is blooming, the sun is shining, and people are just generally happier. Here are a few springtime activities in which I plan to partake during this lovely time of year: 

1. Hammocking:

I love my eno. Enough said.

2. Picnicking at Reynolda Village

a grassy field + a quilt + food + friends = one happy camper (i.e. me) 

3. Crafting 

This isn't exactly a "springtime activity," per se, but it's just something i want to do this spring because it's fun. yay crafts!

Also...this might be the weirdest thing I've seen in awhile: 

Why. just why. 

Anywho, I also love spring because it's such a hopeful time of year. Not only are there fun springtime festivities at Wake to look forward to (wake 'n shake--which was awesome, and shag on the mag, to name a couple) but in general spring is a season which holds so much promise. The dreariness of winter is over, the sun is shining, flowers are blooming, and my personal favorite....it's chaco wearing season!! Actually, i wear chacos virtually all year, but I've found that it's more socially acceptable in the spring. 

Here's my chaco tan from last summer!!!

.....JOKES. who am I kidding, i never get that tan. Oh well...a girl can dream.
I'll leave you with a picture that I believe effectively encapsulates my excitement about spring:

peace. love. lambs.

My Favorite Love Story

In honor of Valentine's Day (or "Singles Awareness Day" for you cynics out there), I wanted to talk about love stories. Ah, love stories--I'm such a sucker for them. Here are a few of my faves:

• The Gift of the Magi (a short story by O. Henry..read it here if you have time) 
• The Notebook (cliché, I know...#sorrynotsorry) 
• You've Got Mail (yes, this would be creepy in real life but it makes for a great movie) 

As much as I love these stories, though, they can't even begin to compare to my favorite Love Story of all time. It's a story that begins in darkness, despair, and utter hopelessness (sounds fun, right?). It's a story of pursuit, of redemption, and of grace. It's my story.

Well, that's a little selfish of me. It's not just my story. Believe it or not, it's yours too. Take a moment to imagine your favorite love story. Now wrap your mind around this: that story--the sappiest, sweetest, most lovey-dovey love story you can think of--is nothing compared to this one. I'm telling you--this Story is amazing. Life changing, even. In this Story, we are "the pursued," and our Pursuer is crazy in love with us. So crazy in love that He died for us. Literally. I know I overuse the word "literally" all the time (and often incorrectly), but this time I'm not exaggerating. Our Pursuer literally laid down his life, taking on each of our sins and burdens, for the sole purpose of redeeming us. 

Another unique feature of this Story is that it continues today. It began many, many years ago, but it is far from over. In fact, it will never end. God's love for us knows no bounds. It is unconditional and unending. For me, Romans 8:38-39 comes to mind: 

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  

Jesus is our Pursuer, and he longs for us to love Him in return. So I urge you, friends, to take comfort in this truth: God's love is sufficient for us. We have done absolutely nothing to deserve His Love and Grace (we've actually done absolutely everything to be completely undeserving of it), yet He loves us anyway. So this Valentine's Day, I hope that you will find peace in knowing how truly loved and treasured you are. Regardless of your relationship status, regardless of whether or not you have a date tomorrow night, take heart! You are fearfully and wonderfully made by the Creator of the Universe. And in my opinion, that's a pretty amazing Valentine's Day gift.

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things

Ok, ok..so girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes are fine and all, but i feel like maria may have left a few items off the list when she sang those famous words, "these are a few of my favorite things." {sound of music reference. If you haven't seen it 1. did you actually have a childhood? and 2. drop whatever you are doing and watch it. now. go. i don't know what you're still doing reading this blog.} however, i prefer to give her the benefit of the doubt. i mean, come on people. the woman was a singing nun turned governess turned wife/mother. let's give her a break...she probably had a little more on her mind than coming up with an exhaustive list of faves. in addition, maria didn't consult me when creating her list. therefore, i have taken it upon myself to add to (and therefore improve) it.

1. a fresh jar of peanut butter--Let's just say it's the simple things that make life great. tonight i opened up a brand spankin' new jar of jif (because i'm a choosy mom college student, obvi) and i really cherished the moment because it's not everyday that you get to open a new thing of pb. carpe diem, people. carpe diem.

2. getting a package in the mail--I don't know about the rest of you, but whenever i see that i have received an email from "wfu mail services," i freak out a little inside. even looking at those words typed out makes my heart skip a beat. i know, i know. i sound like a crazy person. it's just something about receiving a package that gets me pumped. i mean, seriously. who doesn't like getting mail? (unless it's taxes or bills or other boring grownup stuff that i wish i would never have to deal with). and then of course there's the suspense of walking to the post office and wondering what the package actually contains. next comes what i like to call the ol' slip discovery, which is when i open my mailbox to the glorious sight of a little slip (or multiple slips) of paper. if i've learned anything from getting packages in the mail, it's 1. i like getting packages in the mail and 2. the anticipation is half (or approximately 40% of) the fun.

3. letter writing--I absolutely love writing letters to people. call me old fashioned, but i believe that letter writing is becoming a lost art. i'm telling you people, technology is literally taking over the universe. i think the world would be a better place if people would just write letters instead of emailing. letters i actually read. emails, ehhh it depends. does that make me out of touch with modern society? maybe. sorry bout it.

4. gummy bears/worms/vitamins--Basically i love gummy everything. call me an addict (actually don't..someone might get the wrong idea and that would be embarrassing.) i'm just obsessed with those things. it all started when my mom got some to bribe her preschoolers with and left some extra at home. naturally, i ate them and have been hooked ever since. of course i've been on the gummy bandwagon for awhile now; however, it was not until recently that i became what you might call a gummy aficionado. 

5. abbrevs--obvi i've already given you a little taste of my obsesh with abbrevs. yeah, it might be kind of annoying. yeah, i might sounds like a middle school AIM obsessed girl. but that's fine with me. i'm a fan of efficiency; therefore, i am a firm believer that abbrevs prevent people from wasting time. see? abbrevs are totes fab and useful.

Clearly, this is not an exhaustive list of my fave things. we would literally be here forevs if i tried to do that. all this is is a small glimpse into just a few of the many things that make me happy. on that note, i will leave you, oh few and loyal readers (actually i don't even know if you're loyal. i just like to think that you are), with a quote about happiness because quotes are (surprise!) another one of my fave things. peace and blessings.

"happiness is a warm puppy." -charles m. schulz 

(fun fact: puppies are also one of my favorite things, so this quote is doubly cool. additionally, "doubly" is one of my favorite words ok i'll stop. this is getting ridiculous.)

First Semester: Check.

It's so hard to believe that my first semester of college has gone by. I just can't even. So much has happened since I began my freshman year. Here are some highlights:

I got randomly paired up with my roommate (who I fondly call "Old Lady Boston" because a. she is from the Boston area *self explanatory* and b. she knits and shops at coldwater creek. enough said.) But don't think that these are the her only qualities. She is also a kick butt zumba instructor and appreciates my weird since of humor. we send each other pictures of baby animals constantly. once again, enough said. she laughs at my southern-ness, and I find her OLB (Old Lady Boston) tendencies endearing. oh, and she's also obsessed with Christmas. our room was easily the most decorated on our hall (perhaps even on campus)...but i don't want to brag.

In November, I cut 14 inches of my hair for locks of love. i didn't tell anyone that i was planning to do it, so needless to say, it was definitely a surprise. my mom's immediate reaction: "Do you like it? Are you sure?"

Over Christmas break, I had the opportunity to go to Passion, a Christian conference (I guess that's what one would call it..?) at the Georgia Dome in Atlanta. (Here's my little plug for Passion...  

Click here for more info.) My experience at Passion is difficult to put into words. It was so indescribably amazing... just imagine 65,000+ college students gathered in one place for one purpose: to worship the same God. Incredible is an understatement. The main focus of Passion this year was the "End It" movement. The leaders of Passion have a heart for ending slavery all over the world (visit http://www.enditmovement.com/  for more info...i know, i know..i'm bombarding you with links but trust me...they are well worth your time.) As this website will tell you, there are currently 27 million slaves in the world. I can't even wrap my mind around the fact that slavery is still so prevalent...when I think "slavery" i think Civil War era. as in a LONG time ago. Unfortunately, this is a travesty that continues even as I type this post. It breaks my heart to think about all of the innocent men, women, and children who are enslaved all across the world, even in my own backyard. The good news is that Passion has brought this pressing issue to the attention of political leaders all over the world. Hopefully our generation will be the one to put an end to this terrible evil.

And most recently....

2 days ago I became a member of Tri Delt!! I am so excited to be a baby dolphin, and I can't wait to bond with all of my new sisters. I know, i know. i'm being cheesy again.

Well, that's it for my update. Of course, a lot more has actually happened, but this is merely a blog, not a novel or a memoir. With that said, i will bid you adieu, oh few readers. If you have gotten this far, you have too much time on your hands are the coolest. 

xoxo, gossip girl

(disclaimer: i regrettably am not actually gossip girl. i just wanted to spice things up. don't sue me.)